Holding My Thoughts in my Heart
by Zoheret and Dove
Summary: It's Cloud's POV when he finds Aeris at the altar...I know this has been done far too many times...but please review...Please!!!


**Holding my thoughts in my heart**

A/N: this is my first fanfic…so please go easy on me! Thanks!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VII…Squaresoft does!! 

~Zoheret

Cloud's POV:

The Forgotten City was dark and eerily quiet. I stopped walking and looked at a large, shell-shaped building that was in front of me. Tifa and Yuffie stopped too.

Tifa put her hand on my shoulder, "What's wrong, Cloud?"

I shuddered. I could tell something bad was going to happen. "It's nothing, Tifa." I took a breath and entered the door to the building.

"Yeah, this place gives me the creeps too," I heard Yuffie saying.

I looked around inside. A long crystal staircase spiraled down to a place I dreaded to go to. I could sense Aeris down there, but I could also sense Sephiroth. I must hurry.

I ran down the long steps and found myself in a vast, large opening of a city. "Wait up, Cloud," Yuffie panted. "I can't run as fast as you!"

But I didn't listen. It was then I saw the flower girl from the slums. She was kneeling at the water altar, her fingers clasped together in a silent prayer. I slowly walked up the path that led to her. Aeris' eyes were closed, but she knew I was there. I brought out my sword.

I swung the sword around at her a couple times, trying as hard as ever to not hit her. Finally, I raised the blade over my head and lunged at Aeris.

"Cloud!"

Before I almost killed her, Tifa called out my name. I shook my head and dropped my weapon. The clatter of the sword echoed throughout the area. "Ugh… What are you making me do?"

I looked down at the girl in the pink dress. She opened her eyes and smiled at me. It was her warm, caring smile. I was about to apologize when a black figure swooped down from the darkness and thrust his masamune blade through Aeris' middle.

Sephiroth!

Aeris looked at me and whispered, "Don't give up." Her arms dangled lifelessly by her. Aeris' eyes flickered and closed. I caught her in my arms as Sephiroth drew back his sword. I held her close to me as my world began to turn. I saw Tifa in tears. I saw Yuffie, with her hand on her chest, her eyes filled with sorrow. I also saw Sephiroth, smirking in the shadows, his arms raised heavenward. When I looked down at Aeris, I saw that she was still smiling. My eyes burned, and I was shaking all over. My time with Aeris flashed through my mind. 

I remembered when I first met her she was selling flowers. I bought one, since I don't see flowers that often in the slums. I met her again in that church. She asked me to be her bodyguard, but I failed that job. For here she is lying dead in my arms. If only I came here sooner.

My mind flashed to when we escaped Shinra Tower. I made her happy since that was the day she finally left Midgar for the first time that she knew of.

If only I could've prevented her from leaving me. Then she would still be alive…

I remember when we went on a date in the Gold Saucer. I promised to go on a date with her so that I did. We were alone… Sitting on the ride…

It then hit me. On that day, Aeris was trying to tell me how she felt. She loved me! I didn't know what was in my heart at the time… Oh Aeris, I'm sorry. I should've known that I loved you too.

Why didn't I admit this sooner? This whole time that she's been by my side, I have been holding my thoughts in my heart. And now it's too late. I took her life for granted.

"Do not worry," Sephiroth was saying, "Soon the girl will be part of the Planet's energy. All that will be left is to go North. The 'Promised Land' waits for me over the snowy fields. There I will become a new being by uniting with the Planet. As will this girl-"

"Shut up." I abruptly turned towards Sephiroth, "The cycle of your nature and your plan don't mean a thing." I slowly turned back to the body of Aeris. "Aeris is gone. Aeris will no longer talk, no longer laugh, cry…or get angry…what about us, what are WE supposed to do?" I gently placed Aeris on the ground, "What about my pain? My fingers are tingling. My mouth is dry. My eyes are burning!"

Sephiroth lowered arms, "What are you saying? Are you telling me you have feelings too?"

I stood up angrily, "Of course! Who do you think I am?"

Sephiroth started to laugh, "Stop acting as if you were sad. There is no need to act as though you are angry either." He started to rise into the air, his eyes never leaving mine. "Because, Cloud. You are…" Sephiroth started to spin, and rocketed off. That was when Jenova appeared…

After I fought Jenova absentmindedly I stood there in the altar, lost in my thoughts.

Jenova whispered to me: "You are…a puppet."

"I'm…a puppet?" Those words did not make sense to me at the moment.

Yuffie walked up to me, and collapsed in my arms sobbing. Then she walked off, shaking her head sadly. Tifa came up to the body of Aeris and stroked her hands through Aeris' hair. After standing there for a couple minutes, she ran away from the altar with her hands covering her mouth.

I scooped Aeris in my arms. I could smell a faint sent of roses on her.

I never told her I loved her. I lost my chance. I will never hear her sweet voice again.

I waded into the icy water just outside the building. When it got deep enough, I let go of Aeris and watched her sink into the darkness. Her hair was undone and went loosely around her. I think a piece of myself went down with her.

"I love you," I whispered.

I knew from that day on I would shed everlasting tears inside.

~_End~_


End file.
